Tuesday, August 08, 2006


I guess it has not been a good month..

Out of the blue, 2 of my colleagues turned to me, and told me that they had relationship problems.

1 having problem with her bf, which I believe is more or less can be settled by having a heart-to-heart talk with each other..

Another.. just broke up from her 2-month-old relationship.. Alas.. she's still much in love with him..

Be it 2 months or 2 years...
Noone can escape the relationship problems.. I'm no saint.. but I can provide my ears and shoulders if needed..

5 years ago, I too didn't escape from the relationship problems..
I ended my 2.5 yrs relationship in 2001. It was not sudden, as any smart girl could have seen it coming.. I did (not saying I'm smart) see it.. but I refused to give it up. I fought back with anger, I fought it using sympathy, but nothing works..
In the end, it just ended in misery..

A relationship where everyone thought it will last.. it didn't..

I cried almost everyday.. I sinked into the deepest part of misery.. My heart literally shattered into a zillion pieces..
I went to drinking.. it didn't help.. I tried smoking.. it sucks..
I wanted to just kill myself.. but I just couldn't bear to do it..
I turned to my friends.. I cried on their shoulders.. They comforted me, encouraged me to cheer up..

Time heals.. slowly.. but miraculously.. almost everything..

Around 1 year later.. I met my current bf. It's like heavens awarding me..
It's a better relationship, much thanks to the previous lessons learnt..

I learned to control my horrible temper.. I learned to be more patient.. I learned to be sensitive towards others.. I learned that in a relationship, it takes 2 to clap..

Now, approaching my 4th year, despite some squabbles during the initial stages, we are happily together.

I guess, one must learn to let go, before embracing a new beginning..
Never sink to making yourself look sympathetic..
Never blame yourself (if you have done no wrong)..
Never make yourself feel like a failure (1 relationship doesn't work out, doesn't mean all will)
Never torture yourself by refusing to eat, drink or go toilet..

Always pick up yourself after everything has happened..

Always remember, if you want to cry, go cry and make yourself feel better..
If you wanna scold or swear (in the comfort of your own room), just do it..
If you wanna tear up that jerk's pic, just do it..

BUT.. remember..
After you cry, take a tissue, wipe away your tears, before you throw, tell yourself:
"I now wipe away my sorrows and my pain, along with this tissue, I throw into the dustbin and I shall let it go. From now on, I will be happier."

Set yourself a time that you have to stop crying and feel sorry for yourself.

Life's a long way to go.. and you'll meet more people along the way..

Always.. learn to let go..

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